Death Metal – Super Mario – Beanie
Pretty heckin soft and hypoallergenic or whatever.
*kinda devours the heads of infants, but does technically fit
Stretchy in all directions for even the lopside-iest of heads
Wear it anywhere clothes are or are not allowed.
One size fits most. Might snuff our a 3-day old puppy since it might not be able to crawl out and would eventually die without intervention, definitely wouldn’t work on an African bull elephant in musk.
WarehouseNot all things are fulfilled everything, but almost everything is shipped everywhere. Items will be fulfilled by the nearest warehouse possible when possible.
Beanies are awesome, man. They’re warm, snug, and they cushion the blow when you slip on ice on the way to class at NAU because the campus didn’t de-ice the walkways. Now you’re in the ICU and racking up medical debt on top the obscene educational debt that you’ll statistically never be able to pay off because – guess what – that’s kinda the whole point and they tricked you into getting student loans to get a degree just to find out that a job requiring a degree pays marginally more than a job without. But at least you’re the sexiest, metallist mother fucker in the hospital.